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Words on the Butt by kevinbolk Words on the Butt by kevinbolk
Read the rest of "I'm My Own Mascot" here: [link]

BUSTED! The joke's on her though...I can't even read!

Okay, so this didn't actually happen, but it does cross my mind every time I see someone wearing pants with words on the fanny (as was the case at the post office yesterday). Luckily like most well-adjusted adult men, I have mastered the subtle art of the "ninja quick booty peek" so as to avoid detection and awkward social situations like the one illustrated above.

Yeah..I can be a bit of pig sometimes. What? I did a comic about PONIES last week. Cut me some slack.
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:iconprestonkei:
prestonkei Sep 28, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I end up reading the words on a girl's breast area. It takes me two seconds to read the word or phrase, but the word or phrase never makes sense.
"What does 'Smexy' mean?" I think to myself. I then stare at the word and contemplate the meaning for a while.
"Smexy." I think to myself. "Could this be the way young people pronounce the word sexy these days? Most likely. Then why is it on her shirt? Is she implying that she herself is sexy? While I agree with the idea, why is it necessary to declare this publicly, and-"
"Excuse me." says the lady in question. "Are you staring at my boobs?"
 "Of course not my dear!" I say to her. "I am merely examining the words written on your breast area."
"For five minutes?" She says sarcastically. "Maybe you should stop being such a pervert."
To which I respond, "Maybe you shouldn't wear shirts that use slang words so that the average human being doesn't have to ponder the meaning of it, or why it is necessary to make such an unnecessary statement through clothing. Have you ever considered that?"
And then comes the pepper spray. T-T
So Mr. Bolk my good sir, I have the utter most sympathy for what happened to you
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:iconjummbl:
jummbl Nov 29, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
So she pepper sprayed you for explaining yourself? What a bitch. It sounds like you weren't even posing a threat.
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:iconprestonkei:
prestonkei Nov 29, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Eh heh, it seems I was to subtle. This story is 100% fake-a-roony. Sorry :P
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:iconjummbl:
jummbl Nov 29, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Well, even if it was a story, it made me angry. I would call the cops on someone who pepper sprays me for no apparent reason, that's assault
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:iconprestonkei:
prestonkei Nov 29, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Heh heh. Ass-ault.
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:iconbo23bobad6:
bo23bobad6 Oct 23, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
my brains just exploded out of the relatability of your comment *brainfart*
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:iconofficial-izzy:
official-izzy Jun 13, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Sadly, some girls in my eighth grade class wear low-cut shirts or words on the butt. Unfortunately, my eyes do draw towards those areas. ( and I'm a girl!) :/ No one caught me... yet. :O
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:iconpittstop:
Ninja peeks are the best aren't they. :D
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:icondorain1:
Dorain1 Nov 19, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
If girls don't want guys looking at their butts, then stop fishing for looks by wearing tight pants. Track pants get you through the day just as well as tight jeans.
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:iconcandyheartsweetness:
CandyHeartSweetness Nov 6, 2012  Student General Artist
HAHAHAHA XDDDD
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